politics

Not my favorite topic of conversation. In fact, it's one of my least favorites. I rarely talk politics, and I think most of that is the result of living in a constant state of political intimidation. I tend to vote conservatively. I'm pretty "American" when it comes to things like taxes, abortion, capital punishment, minimum wage and even gun control. That being said, I don't worship George Bush, even though I am registered a republican, and I don't know how I feel about the war. I can't get enough square facts on either side to make an informed decision.

I decided to register republican because that party most closely holds to the principals and convictions I carry. Well, as closely as a political party can. I don't believe in legislating morality, but I do believe that if something comes to a vote I am responsible to vote according to my conscience. And even if there are no major issues in the polls, I believe I should vote to honor the generations of women who suffered so much to give me that right. I'm not a party puppet, and detest reaction and extremes - whatever your party.

I live in what has been deemed one of the most progressively liberal cities in the US. My downtown community is one huge mish-mash of everything you would expect in a progressively liberal city, with a transit mall for our award winning transit system, a downtown trolley, a huge university, art schools, galleries, art and history museums and performing arts centers. We even have Forest Park, an area described by Wikipedia as "a municipal and public park, located west of downtown Portland, Oregon. It is the largest natural urban forest reserve in the U.S. The park is 5,000 acres (20.23 km²) with 4,873 acres (19.72 km²) of second and old growth forest, threaded by more than 70 miles (112 km) of recreational trails. Forest Park stretches for over eight miles (13 km) on hillsides overlooking the Willamette River."

Not that any of those are bad things. I use them and enjoy them. I just resent the excessive waste and taxation that comes with "liberal" government. I'm just not a fan of an entity that operates with no accountability telling me that I should give them more and more of my income in taxes so that they can decide what things are best for me. I also have a hard time with what I see as reaction and over-reaction to problems and injustice. I wish people used their brains as much as their adrenaline when looking at social and political issues.

Needless to say, in my downtown world and in my travel-industry, downtown job that doesn't require drug testing (I'm sure we'd lose much of our staff if we did!), I am not only far outnumbered, I would be subject to ridicule and harassment if it were clear how I lean politically. In the three years I've worked there I have had to hear almost daily slander against principals that I embrace, both locally and nationally, and even had some of my co-workers talk trash about the "damn right-wing Christians" and "stupid God-lovers". I am a persecuted minority, and I don't say that jokingly. It is what it is, and I've learned to live with it.

This is why I found this article in the Willamette Week (a local alternative newspaper) so refreshing. It was about an anti-war protest that took place a mere dozen yards from my living room and drew 15,000 people to the park behind my building (not the same park noted above). I personally hate protests, maybe because this town is glutted with them. I think they're a waste of community resources, and the big ones always get infiltrated by punk, wanna-be anarchists who try to start riots later. There were a dozen arrested after this one. It's not going to change any one's mind or any one's vote. It's a waste of time and energy, and makes people feel like they're doing something when they aren't.

There are a few "bad words" in the piece, so don't read it out loud to your kids. But I was grateful for the honesty and encourage you to read it. If you want a real feel for Portland read the comments too.

song

Don't you wish your commute was like this?

ecstatic

Just found out Five O'Clock People is back (minus Kris...but you can't have everything) and recording a new album. They are one of the most talented bands ever, and Jov, one of my good friends and one of the most amazing drummers you've ever heard, is recording some of the songs with them!

Their last album, The Nothing Venture (listen to it here. 'sorry' & 'glass' are my favs), has been in my regular play list since it's 1999 release. They are the amazing live, but when they used to play at the 24 hour Starbucks on the westside they had the worlds biggest mob of teenage girls I have ever seen converge on Frappuccinoland!

Anyway, I'm really really really happy they're back and rockin' it with my friend!

dormir

This was the bed I got a year ago December in my little studio apartment. I wanted a twin because I wanted it to look more sofa-like since it was in my living room. Or maybe I should say my living room was in my bedroom. Anyway, you get the picture.

It was the mattress from a trundle bed, and at first it was just sitting on the floor. It wasn't comfortable for very long, and pretty soon I was hoping to get my hands on a box springs support to both lift it off the floor and to make my back stop aching. I did get a box springs, but it was 2nd hand, and ancient, and was only comfy for about a month. I knew a new bed would be pricey, but I figured I could tough it out since I was moving to the UK in December, right? Wrong.

So here I am in March, having been almost three months in my nice new apartment with a lovely bedroom that is completely apart from my living room, and my puny bed takes up only about a 7th of my bedroom. It hurts my back so much that I've taken to sleeping on my sofa bed. Now that's bad. I was thinking I wouldn't be able to buy a new bed for a couple more months (they're a bit spendy!), but two days ago I saw a paper on the corkboard in our lunchroom saying one of the management at my company is selling an approximately one-year-old queen size bed she bought for her guest room and doesn't need now that she'll have a roommate. She's selling it for about a third of what I could get it for new. So I'm snatching up! Goodbye painful little bed...hello good night's sleep.

super

Isn't it interesting how life is always super something? Super-busy, super-fun, super-stressful...it never seems to just be. This week work was (as it has been lately) super-crazy, so I took a super-break and pulled a vacation day on Friday. I can tell you that even after a 3-day weekend, I'm not super-ready to head back tomorrow.

This past week I gave myself a couple of commitments to keep. I decided I needed to spend more time with Jesus, so I made myself turn off the TV an hour or so earlier than I have been, and hang out with God. It was nice, pretty uneventful, but still good. On the first night I started talking to Him about how I find myself occasionally slammed with suddenly feeling really really insecure with people I know really well. It's very odd, and doesn't happen that much, but when it does I'm always dazed and wondering where it came from. I told God that we really should get to the bottom of it.Be careful what you pray for.

My nice, chill weekend suddenly had situation come up that threw me directly into feeling very insecure, self-protective and a little psycho. The psycho came from trying to talk it out, and my attempts at communication frustrating myself and the person with whom I was trying to communicate. Of course, things are resolved - as I knew they would be, but now the issue is on the surface and I have to let God show me how to walk out dealing with it.

Needless to say, I cried alot the last couple days. (It makes me not ever want to get married. I'm sure I'd make a horrible, irrational, no-good-at-expressing-myself-off-the-cuff disaster of trying to work things out when there was a disagreement.) Even thought I'm taking healthy steps to change my perceptions to more closely reflect reality, I feel a bit baggage-y - not my favorite feeling. But if feeling messed up for a few days while I look at things means this will be dealt with and I won't have to face it again, I guess it's worth it in the end.